When Work Makes You Question Yourself: The Psychological Impact of Being Put on a PIP

Imagine working late into the night, sometimes into the early hours of the morning trying to finish a project, meet expectations and prove that you can do the job. You are exhausted. Your nervous system is already running on overdrive. Perhaps you haven't been sleeping properly. Work follows you home. You replay conversations with your manager and worry about whether you have done enough. And then you are told that you are being placed on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP). For some people, this can be incredibly demoralising.

A PIP Is Not Always Just About Performance

A PIP has its place. There are times when an employee may genuinely not be meeting the requirements of a role. Sometimes there is a mismatch between the person, the position, the team or even the culture of the organisation. A PIP can provide clarity about what needs to change and an opportunity for improvement.

But in my clinical work, I also meet people who are passionate about what they do and have been trying incredibly hard. Sometimes what they needed wasn't necessarily a performance plan. They needed guidance, clearer expectations, mentoring or support. And unfortunately, this doesn't always happen. Managers themselves may be overwhelmed. Teams may be stretched. Everyone is protecting their own workload. A manager who once had time to coach their staff may now be struggling simply to complete their own work. The employee keeps trying harder. Until eventually, something gives.

When Performance Anxiety Becomes the Problem

Being told that your performance is being formally monitored can trigger much more than disappointment. For some people, work gradually becomes a place of threat. They may begin experiencing:

• anxiety before meetings or even before opening an email

• hypervigilance around their manager

• replaying conversations and overanalyzing feedback

• loss of confidence and motivation

• fear of making another mistake

• procrastination or avoidance

• difficulty speaking up or asking for what they need

• reassurance-seeking

• freezing around authority figures

• working even longer hours to prove themselves

• physical and emotional exhaustion

  
  

And eventually, something quite paradoxical can happen. The anxiety about performing well begins interfering with the person's ability to perform well. Concentration becomes harder. Decision-making becomes slower. Creativity disappears. Small mistakes feel catastrophic. A tired brain and an overwhelmed nervous system do not necessarily perform better simply because we tell them to try harder.

Sometimes Work Touches Something Older

This is also where my work often becomes less about the PIP itself and more about what the experience has activated within the person. For someone who has always been afraid of disappointing authority figures, a manager's criticism may feel disproportionately frightening.

For someone who learned to gain approval by working hard, their response may be:

"I just need to work harder and prove myself."

For someone carrying an old belief of not being good enough:

"Perhaps they have finally realised that I'm not capable."

Others become angry or disengaged:

"Nothing I do is good enough anyway, so why should I bother?"

In Transactional Analysis, we might understand some of these responses as coming from an Adapted Child - compliant, fearful and trying desperately to please, or sometimes a Rebellious Child - that wants to resist, withdraw or fight against what feels unfair, while the workplace situation is happening in the present moment. Simply put, sometimes our nervous system is responding with everything we learned / experienced in the past.

So What Do We Do in Therapy?

I don't think therapy should simply help someone tolerate an unhealthy situation better. Nor is my role to tell someone whether they should resign or stay. Instead, we slow things down.

First, we work towards bringing some calm back into the nervous system. Depending on the person, I may use simple breathing and grounding practices, EFT tapping, MEMI, Brain Switch or other body-based regulation approaches. When someone is operating constantly from fear and exhaustion, it can be difficult to see choices clearly. Calm does not necessarily solve the problem. But calm gives us a better place from which to look at the problem.

Then we begin looking at the bigger picture. I sometimes ask clients to look back over their entire work history rather than judging themselves solely through what is happening in their current job.

• Where have you done well?

• What have you survived?

• What have you learned?

• What strengths have carried you this far?

• Where have you shown persistence, adaptability or resilience?

Sometimes a person who currently feels like a failure suddenly remembers that this difficult chapter is only one part of a much larger working life.

Stay, Leave Or Wait and See?

There isn't one right answer. I have seen people decide to stay. They seek clarity from HR. They speak with their team leader. They ask exactly what is expected of them, request guidance, document their progress and give themselves the opportunity to see what happens. And sometimes that is the right decision. I have also seen people decide, before their PIP has even ended, that they are ready to move on. What has struck me is the change I sometimes see once that decision is made. They seem lighter. They sleep better. They feel liberated.

The situation hasn't necessarily changed yet but their relationship with it has. They are no longer using all their energy fighting to remain somewhere that perhaps no longer fits.

Sometimes when we stop resisting change, we finally create space for something else to happen. And sometimes it turns out to be for the better.

Coming Back to What Is Enough

One of the conversations I increasingly have with clients experiencing workplace anxiety is surprisingly simple: What is actually important to you now?

Not five or ten years ago.

Now.

What does enough look like?

Enough money.

Enough achievement.

Enough recognition.

Enough responsibility.

Enough time.

Because sometimes we become so focused on proving that we can succeed in a particular job that we forget to ask whether succeeding there still gives us the life we want. I also encourage people to look beyond work when thinking about wellbeing. I often think of wellbeing through four interconnected areas:

Mental: What helps my mind feel less overwhelmed? This might include therapy, boundaries around work, reducing rumination, journalling or simply having periods when I am not solving problems.

Physical: Am I sleeping, eating adequately, moving my body and giving myself genuine opportunities to recover?

Emotional: Can I recognise what I am actually feeling - fear, anger, disappointment, shame, grief, rather than pushing everything aside and continuing to perform?

Spiritual: What gives me meaning, connection or perspective beyond work? For some people this is faith or prayer. For others it may be nature, meditation, community, service or simply reconnecting with what matters deeply to them. When one area has been neglected for too long, sometimes the others begin to suffer too.

A PIP Does Not Define a Career

Perhaps this is what I most want someone going through this experience to remember:

A difficult season at work does not erase everything you have done before it.

Neither does a PIP automatically mean that you are incompetent.

It may be feedback worth listening to.

It may reveal areas where you need to grow.

It may show you that you need more mentoring or support.

It may expose a mismatch between you and the role.

Or perhaps it is telling you something you have been afraid to acknowledge for some time: This chapter may have run its course.

The work then becomes less about desperately proving your worth and more about becoming grounded enough to ask:

• What is this experience trying to show me?

• What do I need?

• What matters to me now?

• And what might become possible if I stopped being so afraid of change?